Suicidal Snowflakes

Just because I have a short attention span doesn\’t mean I…

Behold! The power of FLOAM!!

1) Gots me a new toy… best $6 I ever spent. Had it for about a week (back when I popped my many tires). I keep it on my desk at work. I take it out when I’m on the phone with someone and thinking really hard about a problem. Having something to squish helps, somehow. At least it keeps me from nibbling my nails.

2) REALLY need to find a new voice teacher. I just really need to keep up with it. I certainly notice a change in disposition when I don’t have dead white male composers to obsess about. Current dead white male obsession: Maurice Durufle’s Requiem. I’ve got bits and pieces. MUST have the whole thing. That and the prospect of watching the Stargate 200th episode give me a reason to live right now.

3) HATE everybody on ebay who doesn’t do international shipping. Especially when every. freaking. thing. I. want. is only available from UK sellers. Like that Requiem cd.

4) Hair is behaving irradically. May have to have it committed. BOTHERED to blowdry, productize and straighten the mess that sits atop my head that normal people would refer to as hair, and the damned stuff will not cooperate.

5) Something I never wish to TYPE again (from something at work): “They thought it was spam, but Kelly and Brenda just wanted to make sure.” PAINFUL junior high flashbacks. PAINFUL. My parents wish they could take back disco and the 70’s, I wish I could take back the 90’s, and my wardrobe based on the stylings of the 90210 characters. *Hangs head in shame* oh the horror! I think my perm still holds up tho. I had a decent perm back then. That’s something, I guess.
6) A conversation I never want to be a part of again:

Party A: “We’re really excited about Macbeth. We’re gunna tivo that bitch.”

Party B: “Save that for me, will ya? I f-cking love Macbeth.”

Party C: “Yeah. Burn it to CD or something. I wanna get my homicidal-crazyass-bitch-wife, OCD with the hand-washing freak-on.”

No. Really. It makes a little nauseous thinking about it. Or maybe it’s #7 that’s making me sick.

7) I’ve consumed .75 oz of my 1.5 oz container of Ice Breakers Sours. They’re not quite as sticky-sweet as the Altoids sours, which have somehow achieved the imposibility of having 700% suger content. The Ice Breakers Sours are sugar-free, allegidly. They’re still kinda sticky though, which I don’t like. And I like the texture. The only thing better is the Lifesavers Minits in the green package. Not the blue… The blue taste like Christmas, and that makes me depressed… even in 100 degree weather. But the green… they taste more like actual mint plant… which seem to grow, for some demented reason, like weeds in my mum’s yard. Could I get them growing in mine?? Not a freaking chance.

8) I have a pen fetish. Not like… doing perverted things with pens, thank-you-very-much, get your mind out of the gutter, Joel, Ted, et al. I just… obsess over pens. Kind of the way I obsess over ponies and Daleks (Yes Mary, it’s DA-LEK. There is NO R IN DALEK!! There is also NO G in “supercalafragalisticexpialidotious.” OK, there’s a G. But it’s not at the end, where you always think it is. Change the batteries in your hearing aid!!). What the hell was I saying? Oh yes, pens. We were forced to write journals in my playwrighting classes… and 90% of my journal entries (the ones that wern’t gum wrappers and chinese cookie forturnes glued to the pages to take up space, replete with jaunty little comments about their made-up significance to my life) were about pens.

I was thoroughly in love with purple pens at the time. Pink seemed too bright and out-there, green was too close to blue, which was boring… and this was about the time gell pens became really big. Oh those things were expensive… but I’d actually do homework and write scripts for crappy plays with those things, just so I could write with the gel pen. Oh Man, and when they came out with the metalic pens… *drool*

Anyways… SOMEHOW… and I don’t know how I managed it… I resisted the urge to buy the pack of 50 gel pens for $20. Which is an incredible deal. It sent shivers down my spine. Pink and green and so many shades of purple… I get tingly just thinking about it… Which means there’s something seriously wrong with me.

9) Flüssigklebestifte is still a frigging awesome word. Sadly, the liquid glue’s a little too watery and when I try to paste something in my journal (grr… he kept me journaling, the evil teacher), the pages get really REALLY stiff.

10) James and I have decided to either save up tons of money, or just get really really rich through means legal or otherwise, and move to another country for a year and just watch television. No real reason in particular. We just think it would be a really good use of 1/75th of our lives.


August 11, 2006 - Posted by | Crazy and/or Weird


  1. I am also unnaturally obssessed with pens. I stole a whole bunch from work because of this. The pen has a wonderful grip and the ink flows out very smoothly and strongly.

    Yeah, I said that the ink flows strongly.


    You think that’s weird?

    Comment by paperback writer | August 12, 2006

  2. …sadly



    Comment by battybeyond | August 12, 2006

  3. I “borrowed” three dozen gel pens from my office for use on my sister’s bridal shower games. All the pens (really, the best pens ever) went home with her. That’s what i gave her from her bridal shower. Good gift, yes?

    Comment by Heather | August 14, 2006

  4. i think that’s a good gift.

    Comment by paperback writer | August 15, 2006

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