Suicidal Snowflakes

Just because I have a short attention span doesn\’t mean I…

It’s ok, honey. I don’t have any balls either.

I love my friend Charlene. We work together on writing things all the time, she proofreads my stuff. Crap, she’s even proofread my papers, as horrible as that is. Of course, I know better than to get into fights with her. Y’see, she has this one flaw. It’s a major one, but one that I oft choose to overlook. She’s a… defence lawyer. Yeah. I know. Basically, I just know better than to even let a disagreement go beyond anything than a friendly banter about the pros and cons of Wolverine versus uh, I don’t know… Captain Marvel. I mighta been part of the speach and debate team in high school, but mostly I stuck to prose and poetry readings. I can’t get into an argument without getting emotional, so mostly I just don’t (Shit, I can’t even call my cable company to bitch about billing without huffing and puffing–I haveta leave it to james, or I become “that guy” that customer service people bitch about)… Anyways… here’s a brief summary of how it went down.

Charlene: I need to come up with a rejection letter that doesn’t sound like I’m saying sorry you’re not good enough even though that’s what I’m saying.

Me: uhh…

Charlene: There needs to be form letters for this stuff.

Me: Your talents do not fit the organization’s needs at this time?

I’d say END SCENE, but it’s so anti-dramatic and it has no punchline, you’d feel cheated if I did.

October 19, 2005 - Posted by | Crazy and/or Weird, Family & Friends


  1. That’s like talking to my sister. She’s a defense attorney too, only for the bad guys. She once defended a cop named James Olsen! Those lawyers have all the fun…

    Comment by HMC | October 21, 2005

  2. Yeah. She uh, defends those uh… salt of the earth type people as well 🙂 Then she wonders why they give her a hard time.

    Comment by TLG | October 21, 2005

  3. Yes, salt of the earth… That sounds so much better than guilty. My sister has lots of prison pen pals. =/

    Comment by HMC | October 22, 2005

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