Suicidal Snowflakes

Just because I have a short attention span doesn\’t mean I…

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By Bizzaro Superman

Batman am worst coward ever. Bizzaro hate Batman with none of his soul. Bizzar hates Superman less. Batman am worst detective. Bizzaro feel bad to know Batman on job.

You watch Smallville? Bizzaro ignore Smallville every week. Bizzaro athiest about it. Bizzaro like Lana Lang. She am ugly with flat chest, though. Bad hair not enough; Bizzaro is happy she continues to be dead. Bizzaro knows Clark Kent would smile if Lana Lang live, but Clark Kent not get over it. Bizzaro feels good that Pa Kent not fly into walls every week. It Bizzaro’s favorite part. If Pa Kent not fly into wall one more time, Bizzaro won’t write letter to network. It is nice to treat Pa Kent that way.

Bizzaro hates comic books. Likes Detective Comics though. Bizzaro continued subscription, last issue so good. Bizzaro likes crossover and stunts. He is rich to pay so little for stunts. DC editors genious to make Bizzaro pay little for good comics.

Bizzaro TiVo Alias. It not on same time as Smallville. Jennifer Gardner am skinny and ugly. She should die, though. Bizzaro hate her worse than Lana Lang. Even if she skinny with Ben Afleck’s angel-child. Bizzaro love Ben Afleck less than Lana Lang. They should live together. Keep tormenting Bizzaro’s dreams.

Bizzaro also hate pizza and icecream. Bizzaro love his job. Next week, Bizzaro pick worst old TV shows he predicts die after Christmas.

—–
Bizzaro Superman is a full-time staff writer for Suicidal Snowflakes. Last year he won the Whie-mea Award. He lives in Metropolis with his kitten, Snowball.

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October 9, 2005 - Posted by | Comics, TV/Movies/Books

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