Suicidal Snowflakes

Just because I have a short attention span doesn\’t mean I…

Thank you, Jesus

Yes, I’m thanking the lord jesus because my grandparents are going into the assisted living apartment complex tomorrow. First of all my grandfather’s doing everything within his power to kill himself by working his mostly blocked heart valves too much. Second of all, he’s doing everything within his power to make my grandmother hystarical. Just say no to hystaric old people. However the hell you spell it. I’m fully lubricated with something like four beers and six shots of rum–those old people know how to drink. hardcore, man.

Anyways, he took off for eckert today even though he isn’t allowed to drive (that whole dropping over any moment from a heart attack thing) and Mary called dad, to tell her that grandpap was on the lamb, who called mom, who called me… you see how this gets out of hand. Mom wasn’t feeling well, I think it’s anxiety from having to spend the last like 4 weeks sleeping over their house every night (neither can be left alone for a minute–she’s unable to look after herself, he’s just fricking nuts). Whatever–I’ll entitle mom to her anxiety attack and getting sick to her stomach and stuff. Especially knowing how visibly insane my grandfather has been, packing for this place. Not only has my mother managed to pack the wrong plates (even though they’re a set, and they all look, y’know, IDENTICAL) but mom even managed to take out the garbage wrong. Jesus loves me, however, and he was asleep when I was there yesterday and AWOL today.

Grandma kept busting out into tears while I was there–she doesn’t understand why she has to move. I don’t blame her. They’ve lived there for like 15 years. That place is paid off because he worked over time before he retired and sunk every penny into paying the mortgage off early. They got the place just the way they wanted it. They got rid of that awful wall paper in the kitchen (though, now I miss that weird pattern and see it in my dreams) and painted the livingroom a frightening pink (pepto-bismal pink, to be exact) and even replaced the floor in the family room so that it was level with the floor in the rest of the house, and moved the laundry stuff upstairs into there.

I know they love that house, and all their stuff, and the memories that that stuff recalls for them. I’m going to miss that house too, and them living their with all their crazy stuff. My grandfather was talking about staying 3 months (the deal) and then moving out of the old folks home and into my parents’ house. Dad thinks my parents moving in with them is smarter. Hey, man, whatever. Either way, mom’ll do one of three things–kill herself, kill my grandfather, or have an irrepairable break with reality. On a seperate note–my dad’s doing really well with weight watchers and I’m proud of him. There’s like half the dad that there was before. Which is cool and awesome.

Moving on.

So we threw out their meat. yeah, cardinal sin, I’m going to hell right now. Meat that they can’t take with them becuase they’ll have a mini fridge, and also because the expiration date was 2003 and had my grandmother’s handwriting on–y’eknow before she went completely blind. But oh my god, we threw out meat.

the neighbor across the street suggested that mom commit grandpap. While it’s a good idea and all, it’s not nice. they let him walk around for like 70 years visibly insane without commiting him, it’d be mean to commit him now. Maybe thyey just need to put him some place where he can’t hurt himself or others. yeey.


August 20, 2005 - Posted by | Angst, Family & Friends


  1. you really can’t spell all those big words you use. but you’re making me cry . . . i feel awful for your grandparents and your post was just beautiful.

    take care.

    Comment by zp | August 20, 2005

  2. well, at 2am after 4 beers and four shots of rum, spelling becomes a little difficult 🙂

    Comment by TLG | August 20, 2005

  3. Drunk. Posts. ROCK. 🙂

    Comment by The BLS | August 22, 2005

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